Justia Law Review

The Daily Business Review reported on a federal class action settlement by Sharper Image over its air purifiers. Unfortunately, for Sharper Image, Judge Cecilia Altonaga denied the settlement without prejudice. Fortunately, for us, Sharper Image had filed the Settlement Agreement already with the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission. Here are some of the more interesting provisions:

§ 10.2 Settling Defendant agrees to pay an amount not to exceed $1,875,000.00, plus the additional expenses outlined in paragraph 9 above, subject to application for an award of attorneys' fees and expenses and Court approval, as full payment for all attorneys' fees, costs, and expenses incurred in connection with this Class Action.

For $1,875,000, the settling defendants' lawyers got them...

§ 8.2.2 One (1) Merchandise Credit in the amount of $19.00 shall be made available to each Settlement Class Member, limited to one (1) per Household (regardless of the number of Ionic Breeze® products Purchased by said member or the amount spent on said products) who is either (1) found in the Ionic Breeze® Database; or (2) provides Proof of Purchase as set forth herein.

19 bucks...

§1.24.2 Merchandise Credits can only be redeemed from (1) Sharper Image retail stores in the United States; (2) Sharper Image's online store at www.sharperimage.com; or (3) by phone or mail order directly from Sharper Image.

which must be spent at Sharper Image...

1.24.1 "Merchandise Credit" means the credit given to Settlement Class Members that are redeemable only for Sharper Image Branded Products to which Settlement Class Members are entitled as provided in § 8.

and only on Sharper Image Branded Products, meaning you cannot apply the coupon to the i-Dog Musicial Companion for iPod and MP3 Players. Full price, baby!

§ 14. Agreement Not to Disparage Ionic Breeze® Products. Settlement Class Counsel, Plaintiffs, and the Settlement Class Members agree not to disparage the Ionic Breeze® or Sharper Image and its products, and expressly waive any right to assert First Amendment, Free Speech, or anti-SLAPP protection in any action to enforce this provision.

And, while you can criticize the settlement, you can't talk smack about the Ionic Breeze® or Sharper Image and its products (so there goes the "sucks" site). You have to spend the $19 with them, on their house branded products, and in return, you have to pledge an oath of silence? But, that's not all...

§ 8.2.3 The Merchandise Credit shall be valid for one year from the date of Notice of Final Approval.

This is a limited time offer. Operators are standing by.

§ 10.6 Each of the two Settlement Class Representatives will receive an incentive award of $10,000.

And two lucky plaintiffs receive an "incentive award" of $10,000, presumably in cold, hard cash. No coupon with a one-year expiration date for Sharper Image branded products for them! I presume the attorney's fees won't be paid in store credit either.

References

• Class Action: Attorney's Plea in Miami Derails Calif. Settlement. From the Daily Business Review.
• Settlement Agreement and Release, dated January 16, 2007 by and among plaintiffs Manuel Figueroa and Dixie M. Garner, the settlement class, and defendant Sharper Image Corporation. From the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission.
• Court Dismisses Sharper Image Lawsuit Against Consumer Union. From Quackwatch.

As many recent homeowners have discovered, the only mortgage that offers a predictable payment plan is the 30-year fixed. Sure, the interest rate may be higher than for an adjustable rate mortgage, but fixing the rate shields the borrower from interest rate risks and rising mortgage payments—risks that have only now become apparent.

Homeowners who had taken out 3- or 5-year adjustable rate mortgages a few years ago are now facing higher monthly mortgage payments as banks prepare to reset the interest rates on their loans. Since interest rates have rebounded from their historical lows, you may find yourself unable to make your mortgage payments. Potential options include refinancing the loan, renting a room or the house, selling the house, or consulting with a legal professional to see what other avenues remain open.

Here are some articles to consider:

• U.S. Home Foreclosures Up 42 Pct in 2006 - Study.
• Foreclosed: The Number of Metro Detroiters At Risk of Losing Their Homes Skyrockets.
• Colo. Reclaims Foreclosures Title.

What do you think of when someone mentions the USA PATRIOT Act? Fahrenheit 9/11? Long lines at the airport? Domestic spying by the NSA? Well, I have a new item to add to that list. As the winter cold season takes its toll, honest citizens trying to buy some nasal decongestant will discover that Sudafed® has been replaced by Sudafake—courtesy of the USA PATRIOT Act.

I found the original Sudafed at a local Walgreens. Had to take a product card to the pharmacist behind the counter and exchange it for the actual contraband. Oh, and they asked for my driver's license. I could see all my personal information being zapped into some database for the government to data mine. Thanks! And, if I somehow end up on the No-Fly List...

Walgreens doesn't offer all cold products in their original formulation. For example, Robitussin only comes with Phenylephrine HCI and not Pseudoepedrine HCl (the active ingredient in the original Sudafed). So, buy accordingly. Personally, I think Sudafake is really a placebo pill, because it had no effect. Hence, my search for the tried and true.

Even if the active ingredient from the original Sudafed could be used to manufacture meth, does the anti-meth law really belong in the USA PATRIOT Act? For some reason, I thought that was where Congress stuffed all the anti-terrorism laws, unless al-Qaeda is making meth these days.

Voice of America reports that a U.S. nuclear-powered submarine has collided with a Japanese oil tanker in the Arabian Sea. If the submarine was not covertly following the oil tanker, I would be seriously disappointed. Maybe the submarine and the oil tanker were playing a high stakes game of cat-and-mouse. Please let me believe that was the case.

After all, submarines belonging to the U.S. Navy must have the most advanced navigational gear onboard. To truly strike a lumbering oil tanker despite all the costly electronics and trained personnel? Well, the thing speaks for itself.

Hi Friends,

Welcome to our new Justia Law Review - Legal Information and News - Blog. This blog will focus on legal research and news and anything else we wish to comment on. It will allow Ken, others and me to post on what is on our mind. So like Rio's toy box, expect a lot of variety... and enjoy :)

Peace,

Tim

:: Sugar Magnolia, American Beauty by the Grateful Dead